The Curious Case of the “Frenemy”!

Yesterday the wife and I had a delightful dinner at Ray’s Steaks in the NOVA with some fabulous Polinistas! Yes, on occasion we are known to make that long trek from DC and cross the bridge into the NOVA for some good friends and good food.

As I’ve said before when you get a bunch of ladies together gay or straight with or without cocktails *wink* the conversation will always turn to relationships. However, to our surprise instead of delving into the depths of the good, the bad, and the utter insanity that is dating— the convo turned to the discussion of the most complicated relationships of all…the “frenemy”.

Wikipedia’s description goes as follows: “Frenemy” (alternately spelled “frienemy”) is a portmanteau of “friend” and “enemy” that can refer to either an enemy disguised as a friend or to a partner who is simultaneously a competitor and rival. The term is used to describe personal, geopolitical, and commercial relationships both among individuals and groups or institutions.

In other words a frenemy is that person who smiles in your face and then talks behind your back!

So, as the wine began to flow (boy did it ever) and the word frenemy was brought up, the table burst into a cacophony of one awful story after the next of being done wrong by one frenemy or another.

We all have them—that person who you became friends with and had so much fun with until you didn’t. Your “fromance” (friend romance) began when you were both in the same place at the same time. You bonded over broken hearts and even broker bank accounts. But as your life took a turn for the better their attitude towards you took a turn for the worse! All of a sudden your biggest cheerleader turned into your biggest “joy stealer”!

Eventually, we end up dumping these frenemy’s when we’ve had enough. But in case you’re still clinging to hope that they will change and your “fromance” will be filled with bubbly and laughter again… here are some very BIG frenemy red flags that will help you make a clean break and move on to friendlier pastures!

Frenemy to Enemy Red Flags

1. When they buy a round at the bar it’s the happy hour beer but when you buy it they tell the bartender they want Belvedere!

2. Your frenemy gets you drunk so you will pick up the tab

3. When you call excited about your promotion they sound shocked

4. You lend them clothes to help their dating life they pretend they lost them so they can keep them

5. They start dating your ex after they told you to break up with them

If any of these signs sound familiar it is time to kick your frenemy to the curb!

Life is short and we need to spend the precious time we have with people who genuinely have our backs instead of with people who are always trying to stab us in it! TLC got it right when they asked the questions “what about your friends?/will they stand their ground?/will they let you down?”

So, cheers to beginning a new “fromance” with someone who is worth your time!

Musical inspiration after the jump…