I can’t”, “I shouldn’t”, “I’m not supposed to”…fill in the blank. Any of these phrases sound familiar? I know they do to me. “I can’t stop eating…I’m just going to be fat”, “I shouldn’t hold my wife’s hand in this part of town somebody may say something”, “I’m not supposed to take a lunch break…because everyone else eats at their desk”.
We are constantly telling ourselves sometimes more subtly than others what we can’t do. We are relentlessly beating back our instincts and desires in order to conform to somebody else’s idea of “who we should be” instead of listening to the fainter voice inside of us…the one that whispers “relax, be who you are”.
Today is the day that we silence “negative Nelly” and tell her we’re tired of her pessimistic tune being played on repeat in our heads– she needs to go sing that song for someone else, because we’re pressing STOP!
Recently, I was out enjoying a fabulous brunch with the fam when my sister said “why have we never come here before…this restaurant is fantastic?” Our eyes wondered around the table, shoulders shrugging and then it occurred to us– we thought we weren’t “good enough” to come before. We had convinced ourselves that the restaurant held a certain cache that was out of our reach.
How many times do we all talk ourselves out of experiences because we think they’re for “other people”?
We realized that it wasn’t that we couldn’t afford to eat at the “fancy” restaurant for a special occasion or shop at a certain store or live in a particular neighborhood…it’s that we’d never given ourselves permission to.
And so on this day we did. And you know what? We had an amazing 4 hour gourmet brunch with bottomless cocktails and countless laughs…who wouldn’t want to give themselves that gift all the time?
So note to self: The only things that are truly out of our reach are the ones we place on the top shelves of our mind, and tell ourselves not to touch… It’s time we give ourselves permission to be happy, to be free, and to simply be who we are meant to be…FABULOUS!
More inspiration to get over the hump…
Live in the Light
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It is not just in some of us; it is in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” — Marianne Williamson